There used to be a crazy man in my town [Leek] called Noggy. He always used to walk around holding a radio, tuned in to BBC Radio Five. It was annoying much of the time, but quite handy on a Saturday afternoon, because you could hear the latest football scores.
No-one used to bother Noggy, they left him to his own devices. I don't know if he had any friends or a girlfriend. Do women find men who carry radios around with them attractive?
He disappeared once for a month or two, no-one saw or heard from him. "Where's Noggy?", people would say. "I want to know the score in the Wycombe-Darlington match. I've got a tenner on an away win."
You can't keep a good man down, of course. Noggy made his own comeback special. He returned; this time with a massive boom box.
The novelty began to wear off for many people. Walking aroung town with a little radio pumping out Radio Five is one thing, but holding a massive boom box at full volume soon gets annoying.
Noggy retired from public view soon after. I don't know how many people remember him or ever think of him, but I do. Maybe, millions of years from now, somewhere in the universe, there'll be an alien race with a massive telescope watching people on Earth. "Have you seen this? There's some weird-looking guy walking around a quaint English town centre holding a massive boom box."
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