I won't be attending Glastonbury this weekend as a fan, but I will be playing there with my band. Not really, but I wish this was the case. I think playing in front of 200,000 people on the Pyramid Stage would have been the perfect comeback gig for us. Our previous biggest ever audience was one, if you count only humans, and three if you also include cats. And that one sole human was the younger brother of one of the band, and he was only allowed to hang around because we were using his instruments. And we were playing at his house. It might have been slightly unfair if we didn't let him stay.
I'm not sure where we would have been on the bill if the Eavis family had booked us. We wouldn't be as high as Dolly Parton obviously (no-one is), but we'd be above Metallica at least. The fact our band had no name might also cause problems as no-one would see us on the posters or anything, there'd just be a gap where a name should be.
Instead of us, the assembled throngs will have to put up with Arcade Fire, Robert Plant, Pixies, Warpaint, Blondie, St Vincent, Lykke Li, Gabrielle Aplin and Goldfrapp. It's your loss people.
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